Starbucks Zombie Frappuccino Review

Better late than never?

One short night before Halloween, I’m finally weighing in on the Zombie Frappuccino.

Because why not?

Image for post
Image for post
I got a little one in case it sucked. It was totally okay, instead of sucking.

Containing no significant caffeine and no real coffee of any kind, the Zombie Frappuccino is more or less a pleasant apple milkshake with some chocolate and caramel in it.

And it sort of looks like a zombie with an exposed brain.

It’s totally alright.

It has a light, pleasant, fruity sugar flavor to it. It’s probably going to be a little too sweet and artificial-tasting for some. After taking my first sip, I turned to my girlfriend and said “This tastes like fake pink flavor.”

The ingredients as listed on the Starbucks web site are surprisingly tame. Kind of like the recent, excellent tea infusions, there are relatively few chemicals and relatively several actual fruit things.

I don’t think it’s as obviously “Halloweeny” as the Frappula Frappuccino of years past. I also think that one was a little bit more tasty and less hyper-sweet.

Starbucks could probably rebrand this as “Delightful Pink Apple Frap” and sell it in the spring.

Or maybe when the Unicorn Frap inevitably returns, they’ll just bring this one back as the Zombie Unicorn Frap for some crossover appeal between those two fanbases.

You’ve probably already had one of these if you were interested in it. And if you weren’t, it’s because you already knew this wasn’t for you. If you want something with coffee in it…this might taste totally okay with coffee added to it.

But I’m just speculating baselessly because I didn’t do that.

I didn’t know what to expect from this really, because I’d read impressions ranging from “It’s great!” all the way to “It’s literally the worst drink ever!

It’s probably somewhere in the upper middle of that range.

Unless you don’t like milkshakes. Or sugar.

Find Me: Twitter, Medium, www.worldbolding.com

I do radio voice work by day, and write by day and night. I studied film and production. I love audio, design, and music. Also video games.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store