I Taunt Myself Every Day About Not Finishing The Witcher 3

I have this Witcher 3 keychain thing.

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It was a pre-order bonus at Gamestop in the US. I didn’t actually pre-order the game at Gamestop…but at the time I knew the people working there, they were buried up to their heads in extra keychains, and they gave me one.

When I first launched The Witcher 3 two years ago, I was immediately captivated by its mix of luscious visuals, smart writing and voice acting, blistering action combat, and well-designed massive world. It was exactly the sort of amazing experience I had come to expect from the pinnacle of game development…and exactly the sort of thing I knew would take weeks of my attention to do it proper justice.

I was worried that I wouldn’t find the time to finish the game, and so I promptly added the keychain to my keys so that multiple times per day, every day, I’d be forced to think about The Witcher 3.

In the intervening two years, I’ve purchased all three versions of the game thanks to discounts. I’ve installed and re-installed the game a few times. I’ve bought a new PC that would finally truly do the game justice…which I still haven’t tried it on yet.

And I haven’t made it further than about 12 hours into the game on any attempt.

Unlike the Bethesda design model, which uses a pile of systems to try and dynamically simulate random scenarios…The Witcher 3 is much more consciously put together, like a Rockstar game. Every moment and place is specifically made for the player, and tweaked to maximize both visual impact and fun.

It’s such a cool game.

And the time has come for me to finish it. No seriously.

The keychain is really sharp and I stab myself with it all the time, so I need to remove it so I can stop doing this oh man.

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I do radio voice work by day, and write by day and night. I studied film and production. I love audio, design, and music. Also video games.

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